We Still Out Here Breaking Barriers
I’ve often said that breaking barriers is a continuous process, not just a one and done. One thing I’ve learned in life is that there is no mountain top point and that’s it. You continue to have mountain top experiences, but once you get to one, there will eventually be another. We are continually growing.
I wanted to share a story with you about a recent barrier breaker experience. Many may not agree with tattoos or like them, but I have wanted to get one for some time now, like years. For the longest I didn’t know what I wanted, then I found something I fell in love with that had meaning to me. I mean, I couldn’t get a tattoo with no meaning behind it. Then it was my fear that took over, is it going to hurt, I don’t even like needles, so why am I wanting to do this again? Lol. Well, I finally made up in my mind that I was going to do it. I made an appointment, did a consultation, made my deposit (money can be a motivator, no one wants to waste money, lol), and I was getting my tattoo finally. Of course the closer I got to the time and then to the place, I was beyond nervous, but I kept moving forward. My thoughts were all over the place, “maybe I should just forfeit the money,” “is this going to hurt,” but I kept moving forward. I finally did it. I got my tattoo, and while it wasn’t a comfortable feeling, it wasn’t that bad and it was super fast. Then another concern I had was the healing process, but after she explained it to me, it wasn’t going to be as bad as I thought. It’s done now, I love the results, and I decided to blog about my experience of breaking a new barrier. While you may not ever get a tattoo (or agree or like them for that matter), I believe there are some takeaways from my experience that can help you learn more about the art of breaking barriers. So here are a few tips I learned from my experience.
Tips for Breaking Barriers:
Plan for the Push: When I made up in my mind that I really wanted to get my tattoo, I made a consultation appointment. Why? Because if I didn’t, I would continue to procrastinate and push it off. I’ve been sincerely talking about getting this tattoo since last year (I say sincerely because I’ve talked about it before, but I wasn’t serious). You know when it’s time to push yourself. So my tip to you is, plan it (whatever your barrier is) and push, do something that will push you towards your goal. I did the same thing when it came to starting my Bridgette Breaking Barriers business. I had to set a deadline, and work towards the deadline. There will never be a perfect time or perfect opportunity, sometimes you have to just jump. So I say when it comes to breaking barriers, plan for the push, meaning put a plan into place to push yourself to get it done! Jump!
Face it: While it may seem more convenient to just give up and not face the barrier, you have to do it and many times you will do it afraid. I was beyond nervous and fearful of what may be, but if I was going to get to the other side of my barrier, I had to face it and so do you. Whatever your barrier is, you must suck it up and face it. Feel the fear and do it anyway!
Get Support: While there are times you have to do it alone, there are also times when you can have someone there to support you through your barrier breaking moment. My coworker came with me when I went to get my tattoo. It helped me not to go down my rabbit hole of thoughts (at least not too much). She cracked jokes and cheered me on, it helped in my process. Also, my tattoo artist, Val was great. She took the time to listen to me and make sure I was comfortable. She also gave me some great advice that I’ll carry with me forever (I’ll share more later).
You won’t know until you know: Many times we don’t want to face our barriers because we are fearful, but you really won’t know how bad or good something is until you experience it. Sure, you can get advice from others which many times can be good, but your experience might not be like there’s. So again, you won’t know until you know. I thought getting my tattoo was going to hurt so bad, like I thought I would be in there crying lol. But it really wasn’t that bad. Now, that’s not to say it was pleasant, but it wasn’t excruciating. I made it through it without crying or acting up. Lol. I remember thinking, “Lord, my coworker going to think I’m crazy lol.” I’ll share a video clip below. The process ended up being a super quick process. I got a small tattoo, so it only took like 10 minutes to complete. I’ve experienced the tattoo, and I know that I don’t have to do it again lol. We will see.
Be confident: I shared a little earlier of the advice I was given by my tattoo artist, I’ll share it with you now as it pertains to this subject. As we were preparing the tattoo stencil for placement, she was asking what I wanted. I wasn’t sure fully, so I was like yeah, that’s fine. But I guess she could sense my lack of confidence and looked me dead in the eye and said, it’s okay to say what you want. She said she wanted me to be sure about what I wanted. And told me the same was true in life, speak up for yourself. Even if people get upset with you, it’s important for you to speak up for yourself, no matter what others may think. Often times, especially as women, we give in and don’t speak our truth to save face, but it’s important to speak your mind. This is the confidence you must have as you face your barrier breaking experience. You must go into it with confidence! And there is a such thing of being confident, even if you’re unsure. Confidence is about belief in yourself. Again, feel the fear and do it anyway.
I hope my barrier breaking experience can help you as you continue to break barriers in your life. These tips will help you to face the barriers that will come in your life. Remember, plan for the push, face it, get support when needed, you won’t know until you know, and you must be confident. These tips will help you as you continue to break barriers.
Here’s a short clip of me getting my tattoo.