Thriving on the Single Ride: Ups, Downs, and Unexpected Twists

I was having a conversation with my friend the other day, often we talk about the extremes of single life. Either a person is sad and depressed they are single or they are happily single and possibly not interested in marriage. But based on my experience, this whole single thing is a pure rollercoaster ride, filled with unpredictable ups, downs, turns, and twists. And I know I’m not the only one. LOL. Being single can be a thrilling adventure, complete with exhilarating highs and unexpected lows. Oh, and when you add in my age bracket to the equation, its on a whole other level, lol. Let’s talk about it.

1. The Exciting Ups:

Being single comes with its fair share of exhilarating ups. It's a time to embrace freedom, independence, and self-discovery. You have the opportunity to pursue your passions, explore new hobbies, and focus on personal growth. Whether it's traveling solo, taking spontaneous adventures, or simply enjoying your own company, these highs can be truly empowering. In my single season, I have come to learn so much about myself, what I like, what I don’t like. I have gained new hobbies, like journaling and even recently painting. I plan little outings for myself and opportunities to try new things and put myself out there to meet new people. The independence of it all is a beautiful thing.

2. The Unexpected Drops:

Just like a rollercoaster, the single life also has its unexpected drops. It's those moments when loneliness creeps in, and you yearn for a special someone to share your life with. You might feel the pressure of societal expectations or experience a sense of longing for companionship. It could also be when you have a desire to date, but you feel that the candidates are far and few in between. Remember, these drops are temporary, and it's okay to acknowledge your feelings while staying hopeful for what lies ahead. Don’t lose hope. I often remind myself of the promises of God. I’m also encouraged when I see others that were once in my shoes, find someone, there’s still hope. Keep hope alive, even in the drops.

3. The Twists of Self-Discovery:

One of the most exciting aspects of being single is the opportunity for self-discovery. As you navigate this rollercoaster, you'll encounter twists that challenge you to explore your desires, values, and priorities. Embrace this time to learn more about yourself, to dig deep into your dreams and aspirations, and to establish a strong sense of self. This is the time to ask yourself the hard questions. Your journal and prayer time will be your best companion. It will allow you to learn more about yourself. Many times, in our times of singleness, we don’t ask ourselves the tough questions, like what are your deal breakers? Are you open to dating someone outside of your race or religion? What are your goals? Enjoy the freedom to shape your own path and make choices that align with who you are.

4. The Turns of Dating Adventures:

Ah, the twists and turns of dating! As a single person, you might venture into the exciting world of dating, which can be both thrilling and unpredictable. From awkward first dates to unexpected connections, each turn brings new possibilities. Embrace the journey, keeping an open mind, and remember that every experience contributes to your personal growth and understanding of what you truly desire in a partner. I often think about past relationships, friendships and romantic relationships, what are some of my takeaways? What could I have done better? This is also a part of asking the hard questions. 

5. The Joy of Self-Love and Empowerment:

While the single life may have its ups and downs, it also provides an incredible opportunity for self-love and empowerment. If you know me, you know I am all about self-love. How can you love someone else if you don’t love yourself first? Embrace this time to focus on your own happiness, nourishing your mind, body, and soul. Celebrate your accomplishments, cultivate meaningful friendships, and pursue your dreams with unwavering determination. When you learn to love and empower yourself, you'll attract the right people into your life. At the right time, you will meet your purpose partner. 

Being single is undeniably similar to a rollercoaster ride, with its thrilling highs, unexpected drops, exciting twists, and adventurous turns. Embrace the journey, and remember that this time is an opportunity for self-discovery, personal growth, and creating a life that truly fulfills you. Focus on the beauty of what you have and not too much on what you do not have YET. Enjoy the ride, my fellow singles, and trust that when the time is right, the right person will hop on the rollercoaster with you (because we know the ride will continue as life is a rollercoaster). Until then, buckle up and make the most of every twist and turn!

One of the things the enemy will do is make you feel that you are all alone and you are the only person struggling in your single season. You know how it is, you will begin looking on social media and feel like everyone is so happy but you. Don’t fall for the lies of the enemy, the person that you may be looking at perhaps may be on a high when you look at it. I encourage you to find your tribe. Those friends that you can be open and blunt. Just like my friend and I were having this conversation. Find someone you can vent to, but then also find encouragement with. You can encourage each other, because life is not to be lived solo, we are to be in community with others. Don’t let the enemy tell you otherwise. You got this!

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